Two of Cups: How to improve your relationship

A couple of days ago, I noted how an article I had read could inform and comment on our understanding of the Four of Swords. Today I read an article called Science Says Lasting Relationships Come Down To 2 Basic Traits that does the same thing for the Two of Cups. The gist of this article is that kindness and generosity[1] are crucially important to the health and longevity of a romantic relationship. Although the brief summary I just gave may not seem like such a big deal, the results of the studies referenced in this article are insightful and in some cases, quite surprising.

What this article reveals can make a vital contribution to our understanding of the messages and advice that the Two of Cups may provide when it comes up, especially in a relationship reading. It states that the quality and durability of a relationship is determined in large part by the basic way that both parties treat each other. A spirit of kindness and generosity is what binds a couple in the long run, and this doesn’t mean just the big occasions, like what kind of holiday presents they give each other. (Sorry Jared and Kay Jewelers, but an expensive gift of jewelry is not enough to make a relationship happy and long-lasting.) It is the many small, everyday moments of emotional connection that make the difference. If you can make such connecting moments the rule and not the exception then the relationship will have a much higher chance of survival.

Similarly, infusing a relationship with the traits of respect and appreciation is also vital. Some people are constantly looking for what their partner is doing right (which indicates respect) and appreciating that, while others are more likely to look for what their partner is doing wrong and then criticizing them for it. Of course, almost no one will admit to the latter perspective, even though a great many people treat their partner that way, whether they are conscious of it or not. (Their partner, however, is probably very conscious of it.)

Now, you may wonder why all this is so overwhelmingly important to the health of a relationship. The reason is that when we treat someone with kindness, generosity of spirit, and appreciation, it makes them feel understood, cared for, and validated, and that is what makes them feel loved.

By the way, here’s something else that is valuable about kindness: The more someone receives or even witnesses kindness, the more they, themselves, will be kind, and that leads to an ascending spiral of love in all our lives. (This observation may be even more relevant to the Six of Cups—especially in its indication of childhood, which is where learning by example is of paramount importance.)

The article noted is rather long with a lot more in it than what I’ve adapted here, and I recommend it. But briefly, in light of its observations, we may see the following advice in the Two of Cups: If you want to have a healthy, stable relationship with someone, make sure that every day you both treat each other with kindness and generosity, and respect and appreciation in ways both large and small. This also suggests that you can gauge the health of a relationship by the extent to which both parties are currently doing this.

The images on this post are cards from my RWS 2.0 Tarot deck. 

[1] It’s quite interesting that kindness and generosity are meanings commonly associated with the Six of Cups and the Six of Pentacles, for those two cards can be associated in turn with the Lovers card (Key VI) since they are SIX cards.
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